Squeaky's Undisclosed Location

From CNN

2006-10-13T23:35:00.000-07:00

Canada troops battle 10-foot Afghan marijuana plants

Wow.

OTTAWA, Canada (Reuters) -- Canadian troops fighting Taliban militants in Afghanistan have stumbled across an unexpected and potent enemy -- almost impenetrable forests of marijuana plants 10 feet tall.
General Rick Hillier, chief of the Canadian defense staff, said Thursday that Taliban fighters were using the forests as cover. In response, the crew of at least one armored car had camouflaged their vehicle with marijuana.
"The challenge is that marijuana plants absorb energy, heat very readily. It's very difficult to penetrate with thermal devices. ... And as a result you really have to be careful that the Taliban don't dodge in and out of those marijuana forests," he said in a speech in Ottawa, Canada.
"We tried burning them with white phosphorous -- it didn't work. We tried burning them with diesel -- it didn't work. The plants are so full of water right now ... that we simply couldn't burn them," he said.
Even successful incineration had its drawbacks.
"A couple of brown plants on the edges of some of those [forests] did catch on fire. But a section of soldiers that was downwind from that had some ill effects and decided that was probably not the right course of action," Hiller said dryly.
One soldier told him later: "Sir, three years ago before I joined the army, I never thought I'd say 'That damn marijuana'."
Copyright 2006 Reuters. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Actually, it is.

2006-08-22T19:51:00.000-07:00

Funniest thing my mom has ever said...

Dusty: All these pictures of me are horrible.

Mom: It's not my fault you're ugly.

AP Exam Score

2006-07-12T21:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I got a little envelope from the AP College Board.

Shit! It's my exam grade.

Slowly, I opened it.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit

I took a deep breath, and then peaked.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh - HOLY CRAP!

I got a 5!

:)

3 More Reasons

2006-07-10T17:57:00.000-07:00

Few more reasons you should have watched the World Cup...

Odonkor (GER)
David Trezeguet (FRA) - Thierry Henry's best friend. Awwww
FABIO CANNAVARO (ITA) - GAH! He's gorgeous! The jury is out on whether he can evenly rival the adorableness of Henry. Pirlo hugging him tightly during the shootout of the final made even this French supporter coo.

The 10 Reason to Watch the WC

2006-07-01T23:25:00.000-07:00

So now that US is out, I get to focus on the more superficial aspects of the World Cup - hot soccer players!

10. Kaka (BRA)
9. Rafa Marquez (MEX) - Could've been higher up on the list...but his hair is too oily
8. Frank Lampard (ENG)
7. Asamoah Gyan (GHA)
6.Michael Ballack (GER)
5. Pablo Mastroeni (USA) - My friend Jen met him (and the rest of the US Nat. team) in Nashville. She said he was gorgeous in real life (as was Bocanegra and Convey)
4. Giovanni van Bronckhorst (HOL)
3. Didier Drogba (COT)
2. Roque Santa Cruz (PAR)
1. Thierry Henry (FRA) - You can have Ronaldinho and his samba moves, I'll take Henry's va-va-vooms anyday. He's fast, brilliant, and at the same time impossibly adorable. LOVE!

NOTE: Why is Christiano Ronaldo not on the list? After all, he is young and very attractive.

Well, that is because he is a cry baby and has the emotional maturity and sense of sportsmanship less than that of the 6-year olds I watch this summer as a camp counselor

NOTE: And Beckham?

The vomit ruined him for me. Yuck.

USA! USA! US - aw crap...

2006-06-22T17:46:00.000-07:00

O-3
1-1
1-2

Ugh...who am I more upset at? Donovan, Beasely, Arena, FIFA refs, or the diving crap from every single team?

Donovan and Beasely

I was at the Morocco game in Nashville. When you played uninspired then, I decided not to worry because I was sure you could atleast pick it up for the World Cup. Guess I was wrong.

FIFA refs

Wow...you'd think cards were going out of style the way you ripped them out of your dorky little pocket everytime a player stubbed his toe. Let the players play! Just because a guy tripped, doesn't mean it was a foul.

Divers

I don't know if I can possibly put into words how much I hate diving. You ruin the game by writhing all over the ground, crying and clutching your shin. You aren't hurt! Ever wonder why Americans don't like soccer? It's because you acting like a pansy anytime someone even looks at you.

Bruce Arena

You smirk through all the games with your arms crossed (because you're just to cool to get up and put in a decent sub). But then as soon as a ref makes a bad call, you hop up and throw your hands in the air. Just a hint...when your plan to rely on your vets fails, CHANGE YOUR STRATEGY. Sitting on your ass and doing NOTHING didn't beat the Czechs and it wasn't going to beat Ghana either.

Also, why the hell was Beasley not making any runs? Donovan? Any offensive player? The US team is young and in good shape. Let them run. Don't make them hang back taking 2-3-4 touches on the ball before they pass. Make them play faster and play more daring.

Don't even get me started on the horrible commentary from Dave O'Brien. Balboa just needs to unplug his mic.

2 Days Until

2006-06-07T20:57:00.000-07:00

THE WORLD CUP

(yay!)

Scrubs

2006-05-06T12:57:00.000-07:00

Now, having devoted my entire three day weekend (excluding 3 hours for my AP Exams and 1 hour job interview) to viewing my Scrubs Season 1 DVD, I have determined the following things:

Donald Faison is my hero.
I will never be entirely happy until my world is just like Sacred Heart.

I <3 Will

2006-04-23T19:30:00.000-07:00

Erica: The Easter bunny is the reason for the season.
Will: Eggs died for us.
Squeaky: Wait - I don't get the "died" part.
Will: Not "died"; "dyed", like "d-y-e-d."
Squeaky: Oh, I get it.
Erica: Actually, I don't think she does understand the religious implication of it.
Will: No, I think she does understand because she hasn't been living under a Star of David shaped rock her entire life.

Later...

Squeaky (while searching for exact change): Ugh, sorry guys. I know I'm being such a stereotypical Jewish grandma right now.
Amanda: Es koo'. Ima THE stereotypical redneck.
Ingrid: Dude, I promote the stereotypes of both my mom's and my dad's side. I love rice AND fried chicken.
Erica: Haha, that's funny. I don't think I know what my stereotype is
Will: You are a stereotypical bitch.

Oh, Will...what would I do with you?

I Know Student Activists!

2006-03-29T19:07:00.000-08:00

Right now it's not even funny how badly I wish I was out of (undisclosed location). All my DC friends keep calling me and telling me about the protests (protesting that goddamn stupid immigration bill proposed by that ass in Cali) they're having at my old school, and it sounds so cool.

I wish I was there so badly.

My friend Afroza says that half of the kids in her class are protesting. The police kicked them off of school property, so now they are on the street. Guess what? My ex-classmates took up the whole street....people couldn't even get off the Metro!

Gosh, I miss them so much. It seems like DC, people had real problems, not this fake shit that starts up in (undisclosed location). No one here has any real opinions besides what there parents tell them. A bunch of the kids don't even understand that Mexico isn't the same place as El Salvador (and thus, are confused when I tell them that a bunch of MS-13 people come from El Salvador and not "some Mexican country").

In DC, the schools had real problems...like gangs and my classmates extrordinary obsession with pot. In (undisclosed location), my principal is mad that we're bringing iPods to school. He's not worried that they'll get stole, though; he's worried that we'll download answers to tests and use them to cheat.

Okay, well, Mr. Parker, you find someone that knows how to do that at (undisclosed location) High, and I'll apologize.

At my school last year, there were so many clubs and ways to get involved: Gay-Straight Alliance, Young Republicans, Young Democrats, LASA, African Heritage Club, Muslim Youth, Christian Youth, Latin Heritage Club, Asian Heritage Club, etc. All the clubs had a purpose and a mission.

At my school this year, we have three Christian Youth Clubs that don't do anything. They meet once every quarter and try to guilt you into coming to pray with them at the flagpole before school. They still try to get me to come even though I've told them repeatedly "Thanks, but I'm happy with my faith".

Oh man, I just miss DC so much.

For more information about my amazing classmates click here. Also...be sure to enlarge the picture - I had PE class with the boy waving the black shirt in front of the SUV and the boy in the grey shirt in front of the kid with the red shirt around his head. The boy in the blue and white polo was in Geometry with me last year.

Memories: The Fallujah Scrapbook

2006-03-05T19:23:00.000-08:00

This is a picture of Brian, who used to be the president of my synagogue's youth group. He graduated last year and now he drives a tank in Fallujah. He sent a mass email to just about everyone in (undisclosed location) and here are some of the pictures he attached.

He named this file "melookingcool".

This is a mosque in Fallujah.

(undisclosed location) really needs a brightly colored, ornately decorated mosque. There are two mosques here, but they blend in with all the sepia toned "historical" churches, just like the two synagogues. Actually the closest thing we have to this style architecture is the shiny copper-plated dome over the entrance to the mall.

Here, he is handing out candy and snacks to Iraqi kids.

- Wait! What is that? Can we zoom in there?

Oh my gosh! He's giving her Hanukkah gelt!

That made me laugh for about 5 minutes. Actually, I'm exagerating. I only laughed for about 30 seconds. Er, 30 seconds seems too long. It was probably only a second or two, but I still find it really funny.

Dear Middle East and Parts of South Asia,

2006-02-18T19:24:00.000-08:00

When those comics were first published, I totally empathized with you. I thought the talking head Anderson Cooper's show was an ass for saying that no one should have apologized for the offensive drawings.

But now? What tha? What's going on, guys? Cartoons mocking the Holocaust? Killing people? Offering ransoms for the murders of the Danish cartoonists?

Seriously stop.

Especially you, Iran and Pakistan. Sheena is Iranian and the HOTTEST guy at my school in DC was from Pakistan (seriously, the man was gorgeous), so I've tried to give you a second chance. However, now y'all are just being ridiculous. Grow up.

Love,

Squeaky

The Lunch Bunch

2006-02-11T08:53:00.000-08:00

My school has five different lunch periods, and by some twist of fate, I don't have a single ood friend in my lunch. It's alright though, I've been eating with Mindy "Drives Sans-License" Abou Taleb and Nick "I'm Not Gay" Rhodes from my English class.

Friday, Mindy was at a choir trip instead of school, so it was just me and Nick at lunch. I'm not super buddy-buddy with Nick, so a small part of me was afraid I would endure 30 minutes of awkward silence with the kid.

However, this was not the case. Why? Because I asked Nick about his favorite subject.

Himself.

That boy talked for 30 solid minutes about the following things:

His girlfriend
His "newly devirginized lips" (his words not mine, apparently he had his first kiss last week)
The "jerk" that asked his girlfriend to a dance
His Mormonism
His want to experience new religions
His Mormon parents that won't let him do such experimenting
Famous peope he's met
Prank calls
California & his longing to go back to San Diego
His attraction to fair skinned people (which is code for "I like white girls!")
The fact that he doesn't stereotype people
His friendliness & amiability ("I just go talk to people, I'm not intimidated if they're 'popular'. I just walk up and say 'Hi". That is why people like me. I mean, I'm not 'popular' in the sense that I party, but I have a lot of friends and everybody knows who I am.")

Finally the lunch bell rang, and he was silenced. All I can say is, thank goodness Mindy will be back on Tuesday.

I Bet This is a Jewish Conspiracy

2006-02-06T20:59:00.000-08:00

When The Book of Daniel cast a liberal depiction of Jesus, the Christian religion was under attack and NBC was forced to cancel the show with the tres beau Aiden Quinn. After all, Jesus was talking to a priest with a gay son and a pot dealing daughter. NBC is obviously hates Christians.

When European newspapers run political cartoons depicting Muhammed with a bomb in his turban, well, then those crazy Muslims are just overreacting. I mean, its not like it is against Islamic idealology to draw pictures of the holiest prophet in the Islamic religion. Obviously, the Muslim world just hates free speech.

Mmm...hypocrisy...it's delicious.

Varsity, Jr.

2006-02-01T20:22:00.000-08:00

Remember when I was bouncing off the walls because school soccer was starting? You should. That was, like, two posts ago.

Anyways, I'm on JV. I figured I would be. Just because I lurve soccer, doesn't mean I'm fantastico at it. So, that is all fine and dandy because I'll get enourmous amount of playing time on JV and I know I'll get pulled up to Varsity later.

Well...you know what isn't cool about JV? The fact that we suck. Like no joke. The JV team is tredding AYSO territory here. It's terrible because half of the JV is really good and is just a little bit short from Varsity, while the other half can't chest the ball because they mess up and hurt their boobs.

Yesterday, Coach Jack talked to us about speed dribbling. Then he had to tell us how to kick the ball so it stays on the ground (locked ankle, foot up, follow through with knee). Yes, it is that remedial.

What also sucks is the size of the JV. We have 14 players. At first I'm thinking, "Yeah! Lots of playing time!" Then I realize that it means atleast 4 really bad players will be playing at all time. Of course, someone is going to tear an ACL*, and it'll probably be one of the ten good players.

We would have had more players on the team, but some girls decided to "negotiate" with the coaches when they found out they made JV. And by "negotiate" I mean "cried and got their mommy to call the Head Coach and complain until he agreed to put the kid on Varsity". Atleast Cute Coach isn't coaching my high school team, because then the only way to get on Varsity would be to act like a slut and hop into a jacuzzi with him**.

Another good thing about such a sorry JV? I have a good chance of being el capitano.
* Cuz, someone always tears an ACL. Why is that? Why not an those other ligaments? And why doesn't the boys team tear ACLs at the rate the girls team does?

** Actually, that's mean. I talked to Cute Coach recently and he told me his side of the story. He didn't smoke pot or drink with Chaslini & Marilu, and he made them do the laundry. Something about Chaslini washing my dirty socks makes me so happy. I still think he's a dumb frat boy, though. I just wish he wasn't so damn hot.

Vampires on Capitol Hill

2006-01-25T17:12:00.000-08:00

My history teacher wasn't at school today, so another teacher came over to sub for us during his planning period. We really didn't have that much work lined up to do, so we just had a class discussion about current events.

Wiretaps lead to NSA which led to the CIA which lead Ben Goodly to mention how his DC residing uncle showed him a top secret CIA headquarters disquised as a run-down church.

Then I added to the topic saying, "Yeah, in DC, if you're walking around, especially in places with all the government offices, you randomly see these guys dressed in all black walking by clutching their headsets. You are like, 'Woah, that was some Secret Service guy'."

The new kid, who just moved to (undisclosed location) from Fairfax, delightfully responded, "*snort* Well, um, I lived in DC too, and that has never happened."

Ok, thanks for acting like a brat. I especially like the little snort in the beginning.

You know, I made that up. Because I like to fabricate stories. Because I'm desperate for attention. I mean, how could someone possible believe that government security would be, you know, SECURING the CAPITAL.

It's such a crazy concept, I know. To think that government security would be patrolling streets/buildings when important diplomats/lobbyists/Congressmen/White House officials are out around town. I mean, c'mon, everyone knows that White House officials are vampires, and vampires have no need for Secret Servicemen.

Good thing the Centreville Genius, Possessor of All-Worldy Knowledge, was there to inform the class of this devious lie I told them. Because, you know, other wise they would have thought our country was run by the undead

O Frabjous Day!

2006-01-22T21:06:00.000-08:00

Guess what starts tomorrow at 3:45?

School soccer!

cue sounds of jubilation

Sure, I won't have another free afternoon until late May, but who cares! No more weight training! No more running tests! No more cross-training at the swimming pool!

I get to use the new stadium! I get to play soccer again! I only hope that if I am to be kidnapped and forced to work in a Thai sweatshop sewing sneakers for Wal-Mart for 14 hours a day, that it happens after try-outs end Friday.

Costco

2005-12-29T15:59:00.000-08:00

So...Costco. Pretty cool, huh?

Yep, now, I've always been more of a Sam's Club gal myself - with my mom having this weird loyalty to the Sam Walden empire because the first Walmart was near her hometown.

However, in this past month, I've switched sides completely and have become a total Costco groupie. Why? - you ask.

Cheap Gas - Since (undisclosed location) is trying to make me suffer, it is sans-Metro. Cheap gas, thus, is a virtue.
Bulk Items - In one trip, I can get enough lox, bagels, and cream cheese to satisfy thius Southern girl's Jewish needs for a solid month.
Kosher Food - Speaking of Jews, the local Costco is managed by a Jewish guy, which means there is finally a place to buy Passover food (instead of asking the clerks at Krogers for matzah, and getting mozzeralla.) Unfortunately, where there is Passover food, there is gefilte fish. I suppose you can't win all the time.
Charming Staff - No joke, the staff at this Costco is completely charming. They are super friendly, nice, helpful, and they give you free samples. Besides, one guy named Terrell could charm the pants off any woman. And he probably has. The 40+ lady behind me in the check out line kept blushing and twinkling at Terrell win he was ringing up her purchases.

Antagonist #3: Josie the Roy Moore Minion

2005-12-06T16:15:00.000-08:00

So, there is this Dutch girl named Josie in my 1st and 3rd block class. How do I know she is Dutch? Because that is all she ever talks about.

"New York was founded by the Dutch. LIKE ME!" "I don't care about Spanish, French, German, etc., but I want to learn Dutch...because I am Dutch!" "Hey Ben...bet you can't find Holland! I'm Dutch!" "I aced the test - because I'm DUTCH!" "Guys love blondes. Good thing I'm DUTCH!"

(Of course, when I mention that not all guys prefer blondes and everyone has their own opinion on what is beautiful, she gets all defensive and huffy and says that she's only met guys that like blondes and most guys prefer blondes.)

Yeah...if that isn't enough to make your way on Squeaky's list of antagonists, then it gets worse.

One weekend many moons ago, I'd stayed up super late Sunday working on an paper for English. I had a soccer tournament, so I didn't get to work on it until late at night. The next morning, I was dead tired, and I was sitting on my desk drinking a cup of hot coffee. Josie decides to JUMP ON TOP OF ME and yell "BOO!" in my ear. The coffee didn't have a lid on it...so guess where it went. Yep. I love hot coffee drippig down my jeans at 7:50 in the morning. Really makes my day.

Wait! There's more.

This is the second year she's been in a real school. She was homeschooled every year before that. Homeschooling is fine, if it is your thing. Whatever. Frenchie, a girl on my soccer team, was homeschooled and she is an angel. Homeschooling isn't my thing, but I understand some people like it. Well...Josie's years of having her parent's full attention on her work has hampered her understanding of "group learning" and the fact that the teacher cannot focus on one person at a time. Any time the teacher asks a question, I hear, "Oh! Oh! Me! Me! Me, Mrs. Hanley! Me!"

Of course, then she acts like a martyr later, "I'm the only person that ever reads the chapter on my own. It's like we wouldn't get anywhere if I wasn't there to ask the teacher questions about the chapter."

Aw, poor baby. Do you need a hug? Oh yeah, you do...maybe that is why you HUG the teacher after EVERY period and tell her you love her.

Now...all of that is very annoying, but some people are just annoying. There's nothing you can do about it. Wonderful Josie has, however, so graciously given me a real reason to not like her.

In English, everyone is taking notes on Ralph Waldo Emerson and the transendentalists. Teacher mentions Nature is one of Emerson's most famous works. Because this teacher believes in discussion classes, she asks us all to write our definition of the word nature. Everyone wrote something about "not man-made" or "wildlife". About half the class wrote something about God.

Teacher remembers something and tells us that her old dictionaries have God in the definition of nature, but not the new ones. Josie raises her hand.

"The only people that wouldn't include God in their definition of nature are atheists."

Bah-dum.

"That is not true. You can believe in evolution and science in relation to the biosphere and still believe in God," refuted.

Josie as well as about three or so of the Bible-thumpers go, "How?" Three of those voices were just wondering what I meant. Josie was saying it in a convicting way.

"Deism." this kid Ben suggested. It was a joke because the day before we were taking notes on the rationalists (ie Ben Franklin, Tom Jefferson) and we had to take notes on Deism.

Teacher changed the subject and went back to Emerson.

50-ish minutes later, the bell is about to ring, so everyone is chatting with their neighbors. I was looking around the room, and I noticed a girl, Mary-Ann, talking to Josie. They never talk, so I thought it was interesting. Then I heard what Josie was saying,

"Blah-blah-blah-atheist. Blah-blah-blah-Jewish. Blah-Judaism-blah-God. She says she Jewish, but I think she's atheist."

...

Did Josie honestly sink so low as to question my religion and accuse me of being atheist? Even the way she said atheist. She said it like it was something despicable...atheist. She said it like you would say cochroach or rabid opossum or 5 page MLA essay on symbolism in The Scarlet Letter.

She turned to another girl and said the exact same spiel. It looked like the second girl was defending me.

It's not like she knows anything about Judaism. I didn't say anything blasphemous. Any Jew'll tell you that the theory of evolution coincides with the Torah. Wasn't it Socrates that said (more or less) that nature is physical, and spirituality is metaphysical, thus comparing the two is like comparing apples to Jesus melons.

I didn't say I supported ethnic-cleansing. I didn't say I was a fascist. I said that it is possible to believe in God and believe in evolution. Maybe she'll send a Galapagos island finch (that has NEVER been altered in ANY way WHATSOEVER) to bite me.

I thought Jesus said to "turn the other cheek" not "turn the other cheek to the girl next to you and talk about how that heathen Jewgirl is going to burn in hell. Dadgum Chirstkiller."

PS - And she said "we" in reference to the Civil War South (ie. identifying with the CSA), thinks alcohol should be banned and is eeeeeevil (even if you a responsible adult who is drinking in moderation), complaines about how her gold braces make her "teeeth hurrt sssoooo baaad."

PPS - And she mispronounces words like Protestant.

But Where is Public Enemy?

2005-12-05T20:50:00.000-08:00

Well, I was clicking through my mom's iPod earlier today, checking out everything she's got on there. I know she sneaks some of my CDs out of my room and downloads them on it, so I wanted to see what she had.

It was everything I expected, until about half way through the "Artist" section. Nestle snuggly in between Ray Charles and Stevie Nicks is...Run-DMC.

Yep. My mom wouldn't let me go to a Kanye West concert, but she listens to Run-DMC on her iPod.

Mom, you have Run-DMC on your iPod?
Yep.

But you wouldn't let me go to that Kanye West concert?
I wouldn't let you go to a Run-DMC concert.

But they are, like, ten times "worse" than Kanye.
You can listen to Run-DMC if you want.

No, I just meant that if Run-DMC was ok, then Kanye West should be ok.
Well, I don't have a problem with you buying Kanye West albums. I just wouldn't let you go to the concert.

Why not?
Because I'm mean. Hey, who's that guy in Dodgeball and Thumbsucker? The one ol' Jennifer Aniston is dating? Vince Vaughn, right? I think I'm starting to like him. He's on this Sex and the City episode and...

Overheard in (Undisclosed Location)

2005-12-01T23:37:00.000-08:00

People say some really funny things some times. Some of them intentional. Some of them not so much. Some of these funny things were spoken directly to me. Some of them I overheard in the hallways.

Anyways, I present to you a collection of quotes I've stored in my brain for the last few months. Viola.

Girl: Mmm...Nazi. That is a really funny word to say.

Teacher: You are Will's brother aren't you? He's the school president. Are you a leader as well?
Boy: Actually, I'm more of a follower.

Muslim Girl: Let's have sex on tables...with JEWISH BOYS.

Woman (looking at construction site): What are they building there? It looks like a church.
Girl: I think it is one of those Youth Centers. Y'no, where kids go and play basketball...for the Lord.

Boy: Don't you like democracy?
Girl: As opposed to totalitarian regimes? Yes.

Girl 1: You look like a sailor.
Girl 2: Thank you.

Security Officer (confused): Young man, are you praying?
Boy (knealing at locker): No. I'm getting my History book.

Girl 1: Frederick Douglas is so unbelievably hot.
Girl 2: The abolitionist?
Girl 1: Yeah, isn't he?

Ce n'est bon pas

2005-11-29T19:50:00.000-08:00

France tightens controls on immigration
Authorities will increase enforcement of requirements that immigrants seeking 10-year residency permits or French citizenship master the French language and integrate into society, Dominique de Villepin said. (USAToday)

The French are idiots. Weren't the riots due to unemployment and poverty and frustration with anti-foreigner sentiments? Isn't it true that, in France, workers with French sounding last names will get more call backs during job interviews than those with African or Arab sounding last names?

Wasn't it the French that once cried, "Liberte, Egalite, Fraternite Ou La Mort,"?

Um yeah, I suppose they forgot about that. Then again, the French haven't always been the best strategists.

Like OMG! Mr. Darcy! SQUEE!

2005-11-27T19:01:00.000-08:00

Earlier today I saw the new Pride & Prejudice movie with my Austenite friend, Mel. She must reread P&P a gazillion times a year. I've read it once, but the book was delightful, so I was more than willing to go. Besides Bend it Like Beckham has made me a sucker for anything that involves Keira Knightley (and Parminder Nagra for that matter).

I didn't quite know what mataphysical power a Jane Austen story can have on a girl if adapted for cinema in the proper way, until I saw this movie. Before the movie, Mel and I were having a socially conscience debate over economic policies and taxes in regards to big businesses.

See?

We felt so smart and wordly discussing politics. We felt like Elizabeth Bennet

That didn't last long because as soon as the movie started and Mr. Darcy appeared on the screen, we were reduced to squealing, giggly fangirls.

Hmm...much less Elizabeth. MUCH much less Elizabeth. No more poise and sophistication for us, no sirreee.

We had become Lydia and Kitty.

Parting of Ways

2005-11-16T20:19:00.000-08:00

Saturday Viv hosted the end of the season team party at her gorgeous house in the Historical District of (undisclosed location). Actually, her house is two blocks away from my synagogue, which means I might just skip Confirmation class to go hang out with her.

The party was all fun. Leigh gave me some awesome pictures she took of us. Cute Coach acted really reserved and shy, which was odd...whatever.

I got everyone's phone number and we all promised to "stay in touch" and be "best friends forever" (which will presumably last 2 weeks). I said bye to everyone, including Cute Coach. It was kind of sad because if he hadn't gotten hammered with two of my teammates, I'd be writing now about how awesome he was. Anyways, I said "Auf wiedersehen" to him, and he picked up the reference to the times I gave him a lift to Bham. Then I taught him a secret handshake, and he left.

Viv, Sheena, Livy. amd Leigh amd I hugged for a long time though and swore to go cow tipping, marshmallow roasting, and partying together before everyone goes to college. Damn, I'm gonna miss them.

On Tuesday, fall evaluations for school soccer started, which I s'ppose was perfectly timed so not to violate the school soccer vs. club soccer rule.

Sigh

Whodabitch?

2005-11-15T09:03:00.000-08:00

I think it is safe to say that I am the worst friend ever.

In between 1st and 2nd block I was in the hall way waiting for my friend Kelsey to come out of her class. I noticed my friend Bre talking to Brad, her boyfriend, a few lockers down.

I do not like her boyfriend. Brad is a loser. Brad short, squat, pastier than Elmer's glue, and plays the trumpet in marching band. He's got a psycho family and lacks people skills. He listens to Kenny G in his spare time. Bre is a tall, thin, Puerto Rican girl with crazy eyes that could do so so so much better than what she's got.

Kelsey finally comes out of her classroom, and I talk to her. I glance over at Bre and Brad says he has to go, so he hugs her. He keeps hugging her. He's not just giving her a "Hey, see you at lunch" hug, he's giving her a "Let's just hold each other because we are so madly in love hug."

I busted out laughing. It was the funniest, most awkward thing I'd seen in the longest time. Here you've got this tall girl bending down so her loser boyfriend can hug her. She didn't even seem to enjoy it.

Kelsey saw it too, and also started laughing. Then she hit me because Bre was looking at me laugh. Bre made the "What's funny?" face and then turned red. Oops, she figured out I was laughing at her.

I bit my tongue so I would stop, and then tried to play it off like Kelsey said something funny, "Oh gosh, Kelsey, you crack me up. Seriously, you are like the girl Dave Chappelle."

When I looked back, loser Brad was gone and Bre gave me a really sad look.

I should be nicer. I mean, at least she's got a boyfriend. I really should be nicer.